It's like...

It's like...kinda like...I don't know how to explain it but...I think I can say that but I can't but...I don't want to but I'm being forced to but I don't want to but I can't explain it, but...I want nothing more but I can't get it because....there's no reason for me to stay, but why am I here, and stuff like that..and then there's this and that, and everything gets more complicated...the promise, and then the advise, but who to follow, the heart or the brain, and it's...what I read hurts me, but what can I do?